Blog
It’s time to open up about my recent journey from Texas to Minnesota. God has been doing so much in me since I moved and I feel as though I’ve been in His arms this whole time as He’s knit together a new person these past nine months.
My last year in Texas was awful. I broke up with the man I had been with for 2 years and planned to marry (he was one of the reasons I’d moved across the country in the first place), I was deep in a depression and fought to stay alive, I was diagnosed with a disease and had surgery, I was on four medications, gained weight and was the heaviest I’ve ever been, I was barely paying my bills and my parents were helping pay for groceries, mice were tearing up my kitchen and my apartment complex refused to fix the issue, two of my close friends from college told me they didn’t want to me my friends anymore, I was isolated and didn’t want to go to church or find community, purposely went against Scripture to fulfill my needs, and tried to find fulfillment in online dating.
I was an absolute mess… but God wouldn’t leave me there.
Through my best friend from high school, He connected me with an online women’s Bible study group that met every Tuesday. At the time, I hated the idea of joining a women’s group, but even I knew I needed socialization. So, I joined and somehow kept showing up even when I thought of every reason not to come every Tuesday at 5:00pm. I’m so glad I went anyways. Through that group I met women who genuinely wanted to know the Lord and live out Scripture. I met my now close friend and mentor who took the time to patiently answer all my questions and show me a love from God that I didn’t think was real.
Then she, my future roommate, and my friend from high school came to visit me! I’d been in Texas about two years at this point and none of my friends wanted to visit me. I’d never met two of these girls in person and yet they chose to fly across the country to love me where I was at.
Fast forward a couple months. By this time the Lord had been working in my heart to accept that I needed to move to Minnesota to join my friends’ church. I desperately wanted to stay in Texas and fought Him until my roof caved in and I lost a lot of my stuff. I joke that all it took for me to surrender was my roof caving in in the middle of a “midlife crisis.” Talk about a sign that the Lord won’t take “no” for an answer.
Leaving Texas with no hope that I’d be coming back was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Texas was my home. My ex’s family had become my own and I loved them with all my heart. To leave meant I was giving up on all I had worked for and planned. I bawled my eyes out in the airport, on the plane, in the car on the way to my parents’ house, and during the drive to Minnesota.
Surrendering to the Lord is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it’s also been the most transformative and rewarding. And everything He’s done has been promised in Scripture since the beginning. Since I’ve moved to Minnesota God has…
1.Healed me of my kidney condition.
James 5:14-15 “Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven.”
2. Gotten me off 3 of my medications (I’m in the middle of weaning off the fourth one).
Psalm 103:2-3 “Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits— who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases.”
3. Given me a full-time job that I enjoy and significantly elevated my income.
Ecclesiastes 3:12-13 “I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil—this is God’s gift to man.”
4. Paid off one of my loans.
Philippians 4:19 “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”
5. Provided a new car.
Matthew 7:11 “If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!”
6. Given me a church family with a pastor who disciples me.
Ephesians 2:19 “So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God.”
7. Given me friends who live life solely for Jesus Christ, encourage me, and lead me closer to Him.
Romans 12:10-13 “Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.”
8. Re-built my self-confidence.
Proverbs 3:26 “For the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being caught.”
9. Changed my self-care routine to be more disciplined in exercising, spending daily time with Him, meal prepping, regularly attending church, and more.
Hebrews 12:11 “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”
10. Brought me closer to Him than I’ve ever been in my life. I hear His voice more clearly than ever before.
Psalm 65:4 “Blessed is the one you choose and bring near, to dwell in your courts! We shall be satisfied with the goodness of your house, the holiness of your temple!”
I’m sharing this because if God can do all of this in me, He’s more than able to turn your life around, too. People will talk about how my life fell apart – the man I wanted to be with forever giving up on us, becoming so broke that my parents paid for my groceries, friends who claimed they cared about me not showing up and others leaving, all of my “high maintenance” health issues – but let them also talk about how God came in and saved me. How, while I was making decisions that went against His Word and cursing Him for my horrible life, He left the 99 to find me and bring me into His flock.
I plead with you to seek the mercy, grace, and love of God through surrendering your life to Him. I know it’s hard to be obedient (boy, do I know it), but man… if you knew the other side and the fulfillment of the One who brings satisfaction to the deepest parts of the soul… you wouldn’t look back. Am I still struggling in some areas? Yes. But God is patient with me and will finish His work in me until it’s completed (Philippians 1:6).
Thank you for reading this far! If you want to share what all God has done for you, leave a message in the comments below or feel free to reach out to me personally. I’d love to answer any questions and give more encouragement.
God bless,
M.A.